


You absolutely didn't have me at hello

by thespace_inmyhead



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: Co-workers, F/F, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-27
Updated: 2019-11-27
Packaged: 2021-02-27 01:07:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,277
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21578917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thespace_inmyhead/pseuds/thespace_inmyhead
Summary: "You know, that was a terrifying sentence, but technically you can’t be in the top percentile of getting your throat slit. Being the victim of throat slitting is not something you can be good or bad at. Plus, the probability of you slitting my throat in a bar full of people is very low. So, officially, I’m not scared of you at all."In which Amy fails at hitting on Rosa in a bar, only to find herself face to face with her two days later at the new job she's been dying to start.
Relationships: Rosa Diaz/Amy Santiago
Comments: 13
Kudos: 86





	You absolutely didn't have me at hello

“Attention, squad.” Though not particularly loud, Ray Holt’s voice demanded quiet immediately. All eyes in the briefing room turned his way. “I hope this morning finds you well rested with the appropriate amount of nutrients to last you until the lunch hour. Boyle, any update on the Jewellery store robbery?” His dark eyes swivelled to meet Charles Boyle’s eager ones.

“Two suspects so far Captain, one of the employees mentioned a man coming to the shop on a number of occasions in the weeks prior to the robbery. Apparently he’d hang around observing for an unusual amount of time before buying something nondescript and leaving. My other suspicion is the janitor, he doesn’t have an alibi for that night and would have known the ins and outs of the place. I’ll be following those leads up today.” 

Rosa observed that Charles didn’t once blink during that response. She had a theory that he must have overly moist eyeballs. 

Jake leant forward from behind. “Charles, how small is the janitor? If he’s of elfin heritage like you he may have used the vents.” He grinned.

“I never thought of that Jakey! It would explain why there’s a lack of security footage showing anyone entering the shop.” Charles twisted his neck to face Jake with palpable awe, much like a dog whose owner had just taken out a bone. 

Jake shrugged smugly. “Alwaays check for vents. If they look like they’ve been unscrewed recently, you’ve found the escape route.”

“Sounds like the case is proceeding well. Take Peralta with you today if you wish. Diaz, how did the interrogation of Johnson go last night?” Holt turned his gaze to Rosa. 

‘Fine, I got a confession.” Unlike Peralta, she didn’t feel the need to brag.

Holt nodded, satisfied. “Before you all go about your business, I have an announcement to make. Some of you were wondering who would be replacing Detective Waters. We are getting a transfer from the 64th Precinct who recently made Detective.”

“A rookie!” Jake shouted gleefully. Holt silenced him with a look. Jake bit his lip and held his hands up in apology.

“Detective Santiago will be starting on Monday, I expect you all to make her feel welcome.”

“ _Her?_ Captain, we’re getting a female detective? _”_ Jake’s voice wavered between surprise and excitement, and this time his opinion was shared. The general atmosphere of the room was about 80% more engaged than three seconds ago, people were sitting up straighter, eyes losing their glazed look. Female detectives, while hardly non-existent, were still quite rare. Even Rosa found herself listening a little closer. Not that she cared. She was just here to do a job.

“Yes Peralta, a female detective. Everyone, get to work.”

***

“I’m guessing she’s called Pam, around 40, been working for the past 15 years to get herself this promotion. She’s not the fastest on the job but she’s dedicated and always does her paperwork. Captain wanted someone solid and reliable so they recommended her. Santiago’s a Spanish name so she’s got dark hair, aaaand… a really masculine jawline, kind of like your friend Charles, the one who works at that diner.” 

Jake, Gina, Charles and Rosa were in the breakroom having lunch. Speculation on what the new detective would be like had been the talk of the day. Jake, of course, thought he could tell everything from the name ‘Santiago’. The Captain had refused to give any further details. 

“Mary has beautiful, strong features. I actually always thought she could be a model.” Charles chirped in response.

Jake pulled a face. “Please tell me you haven’t told her that, she  _ will _ fall into crippling debt.” Charles looked guilty.

“Heh.” Gina chuckled, slurping at a milkshake. “No way. I bet she’s super scary and tough. A female Terry but without his lovable teddy bear heart. I mean look around you Jake,” She gestulates with her arms, knocking Charles’ coffee into his lap without so much as blinking. “Sure, we have a lot of female police officers downstairs but it takes a  _ lot _ for a woman to be a detective. Men are totally afraid we’re gonna take over.” She slurped again, watching Charles squeal and rush to get a paper towel. “There’s no way they’d wait til she was 40 to promote her if she was any good.”

Jake shrugged and turned to Rosa. “What do you think Rosa? I mean this must be exciting for you,” he nudged her with his elbow, “Another gal in the group.” 

Rosa stared blankly at him. “Please don’t say gal ever again.” If she were to really consider it, Gina was probably right, she must be a decent detective. Rosa didn’t really care, but preferably she would be cool enough that she could stand getting a drink with her.

  
  


***

“I’m just saying it’s about time you got back in the game Ames!” Kylie slapped her hand on the table. Being very drunk, she misjudged her strength badly, and the vodka coke in her glass sloshed onto the table. Amy was faring no better. She’d gotten through various fruity drinks all bought for her by other people. Her lips were now dyed a glorious pink that was mixing with her red lipstick. Her head was feeling light and hot but it didn’t matter because this was  _ her _ night of celebration. On Monday she started her first day on the job as a Detective. She couldn’t wait. 

It was 10:06pm on Friday and the squad had decided to take her to a different bar than their usual one. A place called Shore or something. Amy was surrounded by various acquaintances from her extracurriculars, (her book club, math club, a 4 week course on time management she’d attended last month) as well as many cops from the 64th precinct she had officially left today. She wasn’t particularly close to any of them except her long-term best friend, Kylie, who right now was giving her a pep talk. A month ago she had broken it off with a guy named Teddy. They’d been through the police academy together and got on well, both having had an extreme liking to structure and information retainment. He was sweet but not from Brooklyn, so had joined a different precinct to her. Two years back they’d run into each other again on a training course. Amy had felt the same ease and comfort with him that she’d felt when they’d first met and they quickly began dating. 

Nearly two years together and Amy had had enough. She felt as though she was sinking deep into an abysmally boring mold of a relationship that would soon harden and keep her trapped forever. The moment she’d broken up with him she felt like she could breathe properly again. She was young, but Teddy made her feel 50 already. 

Today she felt like letting loose. 

“You’re right Kylie, I need to do something crazy, like... have a one night stand!” 

“Woah.” Kylie sat back, drink in hand and evaluating expression on her face. “A one night stand? Let’s not push it. Remember when I threw you a surprise birthday party for your 18th and you went into hyperventilation? You hate not knowing what’s going to happen! What if its some serial killer guy?” She babbled with a hint of panic.

“Yeah, yeah but trust me,” Amy swayed as she stood up. “Besides, I’m done with guys for the time being. Now, give me a second, I’m going to get another drink.” 

***

Rosa felt the presence of someone sit beside her at the bar and tightened her hand around her beer bottle in frustration. She’d wanted a moment to herself, away from the loudness of Jake and Charles, from Gina’s nattering and Terry showing her 40 pictures of his kids at the swimming pool. 

Now some perv was going to hit on her. The only reason she didn’t tell the guy to get out of her space immediately was because she was in a good mood. The week had gone well, she’d got her confession. So instead, she studiously ignored him.

“Heyyy, why the long face?”

A woman’s voice. Unexpected. She turned her head and was met with glazed over brown eyes. A dark-haired young woman in a red floral dress was grinning lopsidedly at her. She leaned heavily against the bar in the way only drunk people do. 

“What do you want?”

“Uhh.” She seemed stunted for a second by Rosa’s bluntness, but quickly recovered. “To buy you a drink?” She made it sound like a question, her voice tipping at the end awkwardly.

“No thank you. Scram.” Rosa turned back to her beer. She really couldn’t stand drunk people when she wasn’t drunk herself. She struggled enough with the sober ones.

“Scram? I’m not some stray cat!” The woman sounded affronted, and much to Rosa’s exceeding annoyance, sat down on the bar stool beside her. Only, she missed the actual stool, slipping downwards with a look of complete surprise on her face. Rosa grabbed her by the arm and wrenched her upwards before she could hit the floor, causing the woman to stumble into her. For a second Rosa got a whiff of roses and a face of thick, soft hair before she pushed the woman back against the bar. “Watch it Bambi.” She growled.

“Woah. Nice reaction speed. I’d bet you’re in the top ten percentile for that, especially since I’m guessing you’ve had a least one drink.” 

_ What even.  _

Rosa stood up and took a step towards the woman whose large eyes widened in fear.  _ Good.  _ “You’re going to be in the top percentile of people whose throats were slit by broken beer bottles tonight if you don’t get  _ out  _ of my space, now!” 

The woman nodded rapidly and turned to leave. Then she paused. “You know, that was a terrifying sentence, but technically you can’t  _ be  _ in the  _ top percentile _ of getting your throat slit. Being the victim of throat slitting is not something you can be good or bad at. Plus, the probability of you slitting my throat in a bar full of people is very low. So, officially, I’m not scared of you at all.” 

Rosa glared at her the whole way back to her table where a chubby blonde woman was waiting, mouth open.    
  


***

  
  


Monday rolled around like a steam train: loud and insistent. 

Actually, that was just Rosa’s alarm. 

“Mmmrgh.” She groaned and slammed her hand down on it, flinching slightly at the familiar cracking noise. She enjoyed the blissful silence this created before reluctantly opening one eye. Sure enough, the alarm clock had rung its last ring. She’d have to pick up another one on the way to work. This was the reason she was the last person still using a clock instead of just setting alarms on her phone like a normal person: severe morning anger issues. Unfortunately, she couldn’t afford to just  _ pick up  _ another phone on the way to work every other week.

Trudging into the precinct, Rosa was confused by the noticeable buzz of anticipation in the air. She dropped her bag on her desk and took a long gulp of coffee. 

“Hey Gina, it’s a Monday, why is everyone so amped? And why are you  _ on time _ ?” She grunted in surprise.

Gina swung round on her chair, hands clasped. “Don’t tell me you’ve forgotten about the new girly coming today, Rosa!”  _ Oh yeah.  _ “Jake’s got bets placed on everything from age to nose size.”

Rosa wrinkled her own nose in response. “He’s such a creeper. Poor woman doesn’t realise what a lion’s den she’s walking into.”

Gina shrugged. “I’m just glad something’s happening around here, I was getting majorly bored.”   
  


“Gina, this is a police precinct in New York, something is literally always happening.”

“Not anything _ interesting. _ ” Gina drawled in response, turning back to her desk.

Just then the lift doors opened and Captain Holt entered with a woman by his side. 

Detective Santiago was definitely not a 40 year old, strong jawed woman called Pam. Well, Rosa guessed she could still be called Pam. She was definitely not tough looking either- she reckoned even Gina could take her in a fight. She was of average height and quite slight, with olive skin a similar shade to Rosa’s. Her hair was pulled back in a bun and she wore a dark blue pantsuit with a pink shirt tucked in.  _ Nerdy. _

“Squad, let me introduce you to Detective Amy Santiago.” He gestured to her and everyone craned their heads to stare. Peralta’s jaw had dropped.

‘Jakey’s got a bonerrr.” Rosa heard Gina crone gleefully.

Terry stepped forward, friendly as always. “It’s great to meet you Detective Santiago. I’m Sergeant Terry Jeffords, come with me, I’ll introduce you to some of our higher achieving detectives here in the 99.”

Rosa rolled her eyes. Uninterested in watching Jake show off in front of the new pretty detective, she left to drink her coffee in peace. 

Ten minutes later Terry found her in the breakroom. “There you are Diaz, always slinking off!” He joked. 

She stared blankly at him. 

He coughed, stepping aside to reveal Santiago. “Anyway, Santiago, meet Rosa Diaz. She’s our only other female detective and a damn good one. I’ve been waiting forever to get a second woman on this squad- you don’t know how many cases I’ve had where I wanted two female detectives on it, this opens up a world of possibilities…”

Rosa had stopped listening and it seemed Santiago had too. She knew those big brown eyes. Eyes that right now were widened in shock and a decent amount of embarrassment.

“Bambi.” 

  
  



End file.
